Last October 4, i had my routine blood test and on october 7, i met with my oncologist for my semi annual checkup. He was happy to tell me that i am in remission. I told him about pains on my left hand that seems to radiate to my neck and my back. He said i need to see a physical therapist and that the pain is due to the operation and not any metastasis. I went to the hospital to get appointment with a therapist but they are giving me schedule for next year and i couldn't wait that long anymore as my left hand seems to get worse with every movement i do.

Yesterday i met with my private lady physical therapist for a third time. I had made great improvement already from where i started, but as she said it will take time to get back strength of my left hand

Eight months after my last chemotherapy and five months after my radiation therapy, all my nails have recovered fully and i have three inches of hair already! During the treatments, all seemed so far fetched, as if it can never happen. But it is now happening. I cut my last trace of the dead nails on my big toes yesterday.

I am seeing my doctor this October for my semi annual blood tests and check up. Praying the results would be as perfect as my hair and nails!.

I am planning to ask my doctor to refer me to a physical therapist as my left hand has not fully recovered yet. There are times pain still radiates from my shoulder joint and bothers me. I try some stretching but i guess i am not able to do it properly. My disposition is still bothered by this aches at times but, of course, i have gone a long long way already on this battle to not continue...

I am recovering...

Yesterday was Mothers' Day. I was able to just call and text my mother who is in the Philippines. I wanted to hug her to thank her for the many things she had done for me. Also even for those that she did not do. She is my pillar of strength. Knowing all the challenges she had to face raising us up, her five children. We are all imperfect people but by the grace of God, we are able to overcome all our challenges.

I also have five children to raise up and it is not an easy task but we have all the love we need to face up to our challenges. Being a Mom, I always want the best for my children. No one can be a supermom to be able to give all that she wants for her children, no matter how hard you try to be.

After my diagnosis, i became half the mom i wanted to be. I didn't have the strength and proper disposition anymore. I am lucky my whole family supported me all the way. Today, i have started to feel I am regaining my strength. It is slow but i still need to be around for my husband and my children especially my 6 year old boy!

I am clear as of the moment but i will need to be always alert of all things i do, especially the food i eat. My children have adjusted well to the healthier diet and i am so grateful for that. My husband is also trying to adopt to it but he is the last one breaking rules every now and then.

With all that i have been thru, i can't really help it but be very insistent on healthy ways. Life is too short to not consciously take care of everyone's health.

My children and my husband made mothers' day worth the sacrifices, the pains and all the body aches i had to go thru just to still be here with them. Life is good!

My 5th child had turned 6 years old and i am so proud of him. We had a birthday cake and simple celebration in his classroom at TIS. He was very happy to share his yummy cake to all his classmates and teachers. They all loved the cake and had to limit the kids to two servings or they will have tummy ache, as their teacher said.

My son wanted to be the one to give paper plates and fork to his classmates. It showed to me his 'sharing' heart and how much he loves all his classmates. In fact he told us that he wants to marry one of the pretty girls!

It is officially 100% growing back already! My back hair seems to grow faster, at this point in time, it is 3 centimeters long while the front is only 2 centimeters. Some white hairs showing but generally black and thick as before. I will have pixie look by July, just in time for my planned travels!!!

After three months since my last chemo therapy, my fingernails are halfway normal already! So in another three months they will be completely back to normal! It takes six months to completely have new fingernails. Except for my left middle finger which still has a gray line (previously black).

As for my toenails, my big toes has just started to have normal growth and it is taking more time for them to grow. Usually the toenails are really halfway slower. I cut my toenails every other time that i cut my fingernails. Soooo it will be taking double the fingernails. I think my bigtoe nails will be normal in 8 months time. In the meantime i should just try to cover them as much as i can or just put nail polish. I wonder if the dying nail will be damaged if i put nail polish on them. Maybe i will try to research first...

It has been a while since my last post. I had been getting better everyday though i had to go thru so many ups and downs. After the 25th radiation therapy finished, i started to hope that all my pains will just vanish immediately. I was so wrong as the side effects would just start to manifest. My skin turned from a little red to very dark red then black. It is like sunburn many times over. Some of the black skin started to pell off but the underskin is too sensitive. I could not put on lotion as my doctor told me to just let it naturally, she gave me medicine in case i couldn't bear the soreness.

My patience had been stretched to the limits again. Sometimes it was hard to catch sleep feeling the little pains and soreness but i had been able to get by. Just as always focusing on better days ahead as it couldn't get any worse than what i have been able to go thru this journey.

There were moments the painkillers helped a lot but i limit by just taking paracetamol. I shouldn't be too dependent on them.

Last week, i had an excision biopsy to check on a lump below my ribs. When the surgeon opened it he immediately told me good news, that it is just a cebaceous cysts. After the biopsy the surgeon was just so glad and relieved it wasn't anything bad at all.

Yesterday my doctor friend visited me. They have their group tour in hongkong and she took the ferry to macau while her group went to disneyland. With my two daughters and my husband, we were able to have good meals and do some shopping. Again it was such a nice feeling being with friends, sharing life changing stories. She has been my highschool classmate and so many things has happened from since then.

I had the stitches removed last monday but the nurse told me the sliced skin has not closed yet so they still needed to put some sort of a tape with thread over the cut to join the skin together. So it means i could not start just yet my exercises. Another two weeks... maybe...